August 27, 2014, TGIW: Unhumping Hump Day -

August 27, 2014, TGIW: Unhumping Hump Day

By Darrell Gurney | Blog

Aug 27

“There are only the pursued, the pursuing, the busy and the tired.” –F. Scott Fitzgerald

We are each privy to experiencing all of these at times.

We strive to be pursuing: a dream, a greater Self expression.

We rarely mind if we are pursued: for our gifts, talents and general loveliness.

It’s great if we’re busy in an effective way. And it’s wonderful to experience being tired as a result of our Self expression getting a good work out.

Yet, sometimes we’re simply busy to be busy, and our tired disposition isn’t coming from full Self expression at all but, rather, the total void of expression whatsoever.

Thoreau said “The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation.” I’m sure today he’d expand that to include women as well.

Maybe some of us just never got the memo that we, too, could have dreams and pursuits beyond the basic needs of the moment.

I visited a major HMO service facility yesterday for some tests. The woman checking me in saw a rubber bracelet on my wrist and read it aloud: “‘Live Your Dream.’ What does that mean? What is your dream?”

I responded, “Well, I’d like to travel the country in a 43ft motorhome doing talks and workshops as I go, getting to connect with people from every corner and make a difference as I go.” Then I asked her, “What’s your dream?”

“Retirement!”…upon which she laughed.

Of course, in social settings such as these, we can always laugh it off and gloss over an apparent lack of vision for life beyond the immediate.

And there’s nothing wrong with a good “retirement” of the old to make way for the new. Yet, in my work with people who had all the means to “retire” comfortably, Mai Tais on the beach and golf often wore out in sexiness within 6 months or so.

Besides doing what there is to do in the immediate, what dream or vision for the future can you tweak or speak a bit more into existence today?

Got hot pursuit?

“It is not true that people stop pursuing dreams because they grow old, they grow old because they stop pursuing dreams.” –Gabriel Garcia Marquez

Q & A
Media Source: SELF Magazine/
Topic: “Tips on Getting Your Foot in the Door at a Dream Job”

Reporter Query: “Query: Looking for expert comment/provide a list of 5-7 tips for job seekers trying to get their foot in the door at a company.”

CareerGuy Response: “Hi Ravelle, as to your query, I’m an ardent advocate of dream job career transition, and have worked with folks in that regard for 28 years.  My tips are thus:

1) Don’t look for jobs like everyone else, through the front door, competing with every other Tom, Dick or Harriet

2) Focus on creating relationships, not looking for a job

3) Get clear about your dreams and passions, putting aside for the moment the desperate need for a paycheck, and focus instead on where your heart is and where you’d love to spend your time if you could

4) Come up with 20 questions that you really want to know about those areas of passionate interest

5) Reach out to folks in those areas, the thought leaders, industry experts and influencers because of research you are doing.  Actually create a research project, White Paper, blog or some other basis of research

6) Get out and meet them, focusing the meeting completely on them and their story and their path and, thereby, building “relationship equity” with them because you are interestED rather than interestING

7) Cultivate, massage and grow those relationships.  People want to work with people they know and like.  Over time, and by systematic follow up, you ingratiate yourself into the consciousness of those people.  And over time, it pays off in opportunities coming your way, referrals, and doors opening.

About the Author

DARRELL W. GURNEY, Executive/ Career Coach and 20-year recruiting veteran, supports people at all levels to make fulfilling and profitable career transitions. His first book, Headhunters Revealed! Career Secrets for Choosing and Using Professional Recruiters, was winner of the Clarion Award for Best Book by the Association for Women in Communications and was reviewed in Publishers Weekly. His newest book, Never Apply for a Job Again: Break the Rules, Cut the Line, Beat the Rest, has been endorsed by bestselling thought leaders such as Harvey Mackay, Keith Ferrazzi, and Dr. Ivan Misner. A personal and business brand strategist, Darrell’s Stealth Method of networking has helped folks expand their reach within both careers and new client circles. He speaks, leads workshops, and is a media expert on subjects such as recruiting, networking, and finding one’s passion. He was recently named Networking Expert for and offers webinars and programs that get MBA students and working professionals out, connected, and landed.