Category Archives for "Blog"

February 25, 2015, TGIW: Unhumping Hump Day……Early Bird Tuition Ends

By Darrell Gurney | Blog

“The relationship between commitment and doubt is by no means an antagonistic one. Commitment is healthiest when it is not without doubt, but in spite of doubt.” –Rollo May

Ever look at a completed book, listen to a beautiful composition, engage in an empowering educational or personal development program, or observe a flourishing business and think “Wow, how did this come about? What incredible mind was behind designing this? How could I ever [fill in the blank] like they did?”

We see things in their final or evolving forms and are sometimes inspired to create our own [fill in the blank]. At other times, we observe what has already been created and think “Well, if that’s already out there, then I have nothing to add…” OR “…there’s no need for my version of it…” OR “…there’s no way I could ever bring something to that point of perfection” and we take no action.

It’s been said that we should never compare our insides to someone else’s outsides, meaning that just because you see someone appearing finished and polished on the outside doesn’t mean that they don’t have the same mish-mosh of doubts, fears, or insecurities as we do going on inside themselves.

They may have been, or currently be, exactly where we are, and yet do it/create it/build it anyhow. So, we shouldn’t think of them as supernatural, nor ourselves as super incapable.

When it comes to bringing a dream career/initiative/project/business to fruition, there’s only one way to fulfill on it, and it’s the same way you eat an elephant: one bite at a time.

A great teacher once said to the student “There’s absolutely no way you can do this wrong, and no matter how hard you try, it’s absolutely impossible to do it right. You will simply do it the way you do it.”

If you couldn’t do [fill in the blank] wrong, and yet it was impossible to do it right, what actions would you take to fulfill on your dream this week?

Got [fill in the blank]?

“You’re just sort of searching for this ‘thing’ and sometimes you get it and sometimes you don’t. All music is imperfect, but in jazz since you’re improvising, at least the way I play, I’m trying to follow my train of thought.” –John Abercrombie

February 18, 2015, TGIW: Unhumping Hump Day…via Appreciation

By Darrell Gurney | Blog

“The best way to appreciate your job is to imagine yourself without one.” –Oscar Wilde

Appreciation, on the one hand, means gratitude and thankful recognition. Yet, just as with property, it means the growth in value of something.

The cool thing is that we can actually be on the cause side of increasing the value of something vs. it just happening on its own.

Many of us have realized that our focus of attention on what we want to see more of, the experiences we most want to have, and the feelings and thoughts we most want to entertain (in our jobs, relationships, life) can bring more of those desired states about.

Similarly, when we look for what we can most appreciate in any area of our life, including our work and relationships, we actually increase the value of those aspects. We get what we proactively see, as opposed to simply seeing what we get.

Even if this isn’t the be all, end all [job, career, relationship, physical location, body, etc.], what one element of it can you focus on today to grow in value?

Appreciation allows us to be as close to be all, end all as we can until be all, end all comes…and it probably comes a lot faster than when we “be all” discontented with ourselves, others and life in general.

Got appreciation?

“By taking the time to stop and appreciate who you are and what you’ve achieved — and perhaps learned through a few mistakes, stumbles and losses — you actually can enhance everything about you. Self-acknowledgment and appreciation are what give you the insights and awareness to move forward toward higher goals and accomplishments.” — Jack Canfield

February 11, 2015, TGIW: Unhumping Hump Day…and Productivity 2

By Darrell Gurney | Blog

“The one important thing I have learned over the years is the difference between taking one’s work seriously and taking one’s self seriously. The first is imperative and the second is disastrous.”  –Margot Fonteyn

Digging further into the idea of productivity and what supports or impedes its growth, we might turn our eyes toward the guard tower.

But not the guard tower outside as much as the one inside.

Growing up in a western-industrial mindset, with the inherent need to have some kind of product to show in exchange for every ounce of time and effort, for many of us the internal stopwatch-keeper looms bigger than any outside entity.

It’s not like we want to end up without “something to show for it”…and yet the overall, internal pressure can very often most result in anxiety, stress, and an overall unattractive disposition. (Well, it may be “attractive”, as all dispositions are, but not attracting what we want.)

Creativity in our work and life, be it in the artistic/great idea sense or even the magnetizing-of-good-stuff-coming-to-us sense, doesn’t thrive too well in a tight and unforgiving environment.

I recently heard someone say that, as humans, we are often either 1) on our own side or 2) on our own case.

Maybe we could all use a little dropping the guard to keep it light and playful?

Choose: on your own side, or on your own case.

Got guardlessness?

“Life’s better when it’s fun. Boy, that’s deep, isn’t it?”  –Kevin Costner

February 4, 2015, TGIW: Unhumping Hump Day…and Productivity

By Darrell Gurney | Blog

“Productivity – the amount of output delivered per hour of work in the economy – is often viewed as the engine of progress in modern capitalist economies. Output is everything. Time is money. The quest for increased productivity occupies reams of academic literature and haunts the waking hours of C.E.O.s and finance ministers.”  Tim Jackson

It’s worth a look to examine our hours vs. output mentality.

The world we grew up in said eight hours was a workday. But that was only since Henry Ford went against business protocol in 1926 by cutting his workers’ days down from 10 hours.

He was criticized by the National Association of Manufacturers, as this was rocking the conventional boat. Yet, remember, he didn’t do it to be nice.

Ford had studied the effects of an eight-hour workday and a five-day workweek (vs. the six-day workweek, then the norm) and knew it increased productivity and lowered production costs.

A wise man. Nearly a century’s worth of studies later, following his unheard of proposition, every industry that has been studied has shown that maximum productivity occurs according to this schedule.

Another wise man in the gaming software development world, Evan Robinson, brought up this point several years ago to counter the tendency of having programmers crunch through projects by working ungodly hours. Robinson claimed that keeping programmers to the tried and true was just smart business due to more creativity and less mistakes.

Yet, how many of us can claim that our external (if employed) or internal (if unemployed or self-employed), stop-watch-wielding timekeeper, counting down our dutiful allotment knows what’s best? Face it, are we truly productive for eight hours a day??

The century of research may not take into account work involving the brain, decision-making, analysis, or creativity. Many cutting edge companies already realize this. If not associated with one of those innovative organizations, generally our internal and external programming (the voice in the head) demands us to put in the requisite time to, if necessary, squeeze productivity blood out of the turnip.

It may behoove those of us blessed to be off of the factory floor to re-examine our old “work” day and “work” week programming.

Even if in a standard 40-hour/week role, perhaps seeing how we can “manage up” to prove our own productivity pattern to the powers that be could serve us.

If we’re self-employed, it just comes down to having that power-that-be (ourselves) wake up and smell the coffee that hours doesn’t necessarily equate to more profits. Matter of fact, overwork over time actually results in what economists call diminishing returns.

Either way, I have a bold idea that hours and work become a background conversation when real passion is present.

Got passionate productivity?

“Productivity is being able to do things that you were never able to do before.” –Franz Kafka

January 28, 2015, TGIW: Unhumping Hump Day…Care to Play?

By Darrell Gurney | Blog

“You have to learn the rules of the game. And then you have to play better than anyone else.” –Albert Einstein

If the rules of the game were to work hard, earn good grades, get the high paying job, keep the nose to the grindstone, move up, amass wealth, and then enjoy retirement…why did most of what seems like fun come at the end?

Our western, industrial-culture mindset doesn’t put a lot of emphasis on the ideas of play or, much less, playing a game. At least not where “work” is concerned.

Yet, in some continuing education I’m enjoying, I’m being impressed with the ideas of “play” and the concept of “playing a game” that can allow all of us to reach our goals on our own terms within far more enjoyable mental, emotional, spiritual and even physical environments.

In private engagements with clients, I’m bringing this idea to the forefront: that our objectives can be achieved more playfully inside a context of performing better as players in a game with a coach vs. sweat shop workers doing tasks and being managed.

How can you bring the spirit of play to dreams that mean the most to you right now?  How could you bring a game to it?

Got gamey?

“Life is a song – sing it. Life is a game – play it. Life is a challenge – meet it. Life is a dream – realize it.” –Sai Baba

January 21, 2015, TGIW: Unhumping Hump Day…I Have a Dream

By Darrell Gurney | Blog

“Where there is no vision, there is no hope.” –George Washington Carver

I had a dream, or maybe I was waking from one. Yet, there was a sense of excitement…the kind that little kids have when it’s Christmas morning or their birthday. A feeling that good times and joyful things are coming.

I pondered in my waking grogginess “Oh, it’s Friday! Maybe that’s what I’m excited about?” Don’t we all have that sense of a pleasurable “break” on the way, regardless of when our particular “work week” ends?

Then, as I slowly awoke more fully, I thought “Wait, it’s not Friday, it’s Thursday”, which carries it’s own almost-there quality, doesn’t it?

But finally, I became completely alert and realized “Ha! It’s not Thursday, it’s not even Wednesday. It’s Tuesday!” I had to catch myself from saying “only” before Tuesday.

What if? Just what if each day were really so full of a Vision and a Dream being acted upon and fulfilled that we really DIDN’T know what day it was?

Did Martin Luther King concern himself with which days of the week he could take a “break”? Did Mother Theresa or Gandhi live for their “off” time?

And even beyond these luminaries, there are folks surrounding each of us right now who obviously live by an energy source beyond the 9 to 5, “work week” mindset. Who are they for you?

All this is not to discount recreation and the time needed to fill our tanks…yet what if it wasn’t the off time that we lived for but, rather, the “on” (top of a Vision and a Dream) time?

It’s easy to think that we are individually too small, too inconsequential, and too tied up in the minutia to have a Vision or a Dream. Then again, maybe we’re only a thought away from it?

Got “on” time?

“You are not here merely to make a living. You are here in order to enable the world to live more amply, with greater vision, with a finer spirit of hope and achievement. You are here to enrich the world, and you impoverish yourself if you forget the errand.” –Woodrow Wilson

Q & A
Media Source: DailyFinance.com
Topic: “Affording your dream job”

Reporter Query: “Did you quit a job to pursue a dream job? If you found your dream job, did you take a pay cut? Looking for people who gave up secure jobs to find their dream job, and what, if any, financial problems they had to deal with during the search and afterward. Financially, what did you give up and what did you gain during and after search? How did you deal with that?”

CareerGuy Response: “Hi Aaron, as to your query, my career is based in supporting folks to pursue and find meaningful work, aka dream jobs.  Sometimes folks indeed choose to forego some immediate financial reward for the sake of newly re-assessed values, which may rank their fulfillment and enjoyment at a higher weight than the finances.  However, I think it is a mistake for people to operate from the belief that if, indeed, they pursue their “dream” that they necessarily have to take a cut. Through the front-door of career transition, competing with everyone else out there for available openings, this is often true. However, I empower people to make transitions through a backdoor or “stealth” approach…which often nets them opportunities they could never access through the front door and rarely needing a “step back” in compensation. Here is just one example of someone making such a move that I spell out in my recent book, and because of the approach, she didn’t have to take a cut in compensation.

Miracle Move #1:  Clara, VP of Marketing for a major telecommunications company, wanted to make a change. Possessing a limited front door mentality, she assumed she could only transition into another marketing role, most likely with another telecom company. At this point in her career, her values had shifted substantially. She had a passion for her Jewish culture and had always wanted to do something related to Judaism, but was used to a big corporate paycheck and figured she’d have to take a deep cut—even IF she could qualify for anything in that field. This was all before she learned The Backdoor (“Stealth”) Job Search Method™. After a thorough process of career inventory, personal branding and packaging, she began connecting with people through the backdoor, which was not about her needing a job. Rather, she began forming relationships based upon research into her true interests and passions…one of which was Judaism. She ended up landing a position as the Executive Director of a non-profit organization that trains bomb-sniffing dogs for Israel.

January 14, 2015, TGIW: Unhumping Hump Day!

By Darrell Gurney | Blog

“Freedom is man’s capacity to take a hand in his own development. It is our capacity to mold ourselves.” –Dr. Rollo May

If this new year is about anything, perhaps it can be about expanding our capacities.

For some, that might look like the development of dormant or latent talents, skills or passions to be expressed in the world.

For others, it may be the growth of internal characteristics such as the courage, trust or faith to pursue those dormant or latent talents, skills or passions.

For most of us, it’s a mixture of the two.

What’s your 2015 mix?

Got burgeoning capacities?

“It would be impossible to find a deeper sense of education in discovering and developing personal capacities, and training them so that they would connect with the activities of others.” –John Dewey

January 7, 2015, TGIW: Unhumping Hump Day…and Last Gift Under the Holiday Tree

By Darrell Gurney | Blog

“Good intentions never change anything. They only become a deeper and deeper rut.” –Joyce Meyer

One week into our new year, and many people have already frustrated themselves by either not keeping or even remembering what they were going to change or resolve to do differently.

Years ago, the Guardian reported on a 2009 study by a university psychologist who found that 78 percent of people who make New Year’s resolutions do not follow through on those vows.

Therefore, many just vow to not vow…because why put ourselves through the disappointment? And though the prevailing wisdom is to set specific and measureable goals, when those specifics aren’t met, many throw the baby out with the bathwater and forego any growth movement altogether.

Perhaps simply establishing an overall context for change, setting up structures for reminding ourselves of that context, and then being more fluid with the actions, timetables, and delivery dates might keep more forward movement happening…and give us at least a direction to be proud of in 12 months time.

For example, an overall context of growth one might want to color their year with could be “Expanding intuition, feeling by feeling” or “Cultivating career clarity and courage” or “Joyful, grateful, graceful elevation” of one’s consciousness.

Then, informing the significant others in our life of this direction of growth for our year and requesting in a supportive (and never pejorative) way to be reminded of it as we face whatever comes our way…this could help keep it alive (besides the notes on the mirror, screensavers, etc.).

Perhaps we could then simply watch as the Universe gives us exact and perfect muscle-building opportunities to fulfill on that context?

No guarantees…but, then again, what has broken resolutions or good intentions given us?

Got active context?

“For me context is the key – from that comes the understanding of everything.” –Kenneth Noland

December 31, 2014, TGIW: Unhumping Hump Day…and New Resolve

By Darrell Gurney | Blog

“I think in terms of the day’s resolutions, not the years’.” –Henry Moore

It’s that time again: when many people get excited or anxious (or a mixture of the two) of what they’re going to change about themselves or their life in the coming year.

At some level of our development, it’s a darn good thing that we stop, examine and assess where we might get better, do better, or live better than we have in the past. There’s nothing to be knocked about self-reflection.

Yet, oftentimes the whole hullaballoo over what those resolutions will be and the romanced state we feel of what life will be like once they are implemented can get a bit melodramatic…and actually impede our growth.

I once read a study which determined that folks who share with others the things they are “going to do” (someday) actually diminish their chances of fulfilling on those intentions considerably.

The scientists postulated that, in the mere telling of the future accomplishment, the person was able to gain a little bit of juicy-juice from the imagining of that goal fulfilled…even though it was still just scribbles on a page.

Later, after getting the “hit” of those juices, it actually satiated their desire to the point that actually taking action to fulfill the goal began to occur as too much work. In effect, they lived vicarously through their own goals.

I’ve been guilty of it myself. Several years ago, I spent about a month coming up with a seamless and air-tight marketing plan, with themes, actions and deliverables for each month in the coming year. I was so proud of it that I stared at it and could have literally hung it on the wall.

In effect, that’s what I should have done because it would have at least kept me present to how full of bull I was…because I didn’t take action on any single bit of it! It stayed in a really nice manila folder in my backpack for several months before I happened upon it and remembered.

What if we put away the illusory need for a particular date on the calendar to initiate changes, improvements and personal expansion and made every single day a ripe time for transforming ourselves?

Paraphrasing the popular Elvis holiday song, “But if every day could be just like our New Years desire for growth, what a wonderful life this would be.”

Got daily resolve?

“I believe in living life the way that you want to live it every day, and if you do that, you don’t really need to have New Year’s resolutions.” –Tom Ford

December 24, 2014, TGIW: Unhumping Hump Day!

By Darrell Gurney | Blog

“Therefore, since brevity is the soul of wit, and tediousness the limbs and outward flourishes, I will be brief.” –William Shakespeare (Hamlet)

Happy Holidays!

Got happy?

“The most valuable of all talents is that of never using two words when one will do.” –Thomas Jefferson